Well damn...here I am a writin my life story like I was a celebrity or somthin. Boy Howdy aint that a fine shake of a rabbits behind. My name is Louise and thats all ya gots to know. Seein that my mamma and pappy were celebrity sorts in the 50's and 60's...not the good kind either. More like the kind whos pitchure you see a hangin in tha post office...so you aint never gonna know my real last name. Louise is who I am-and if thats good enough for the folks down in stink creek, well it ought ta be good enough for you.
I was born in a jet stream trailer during a police chase. Mama and Pappy had just robbed a liquer store and the cops were hot on their tails..Boy Howdy! I'ma wonderin if thats where I get my taste for the Boones farm I loves so much! That and Baretta. I just have a thing for Robert Blake. OOOEEEE and a side 'o beefcake! That boy surely filled out a pair 'o jeans in his crime show days. Not too much now though. Sad to say 'ol Bobby Blake aint aged as well as little'ol me!
Seein as my parents spent a lot 'o time in the grey bar hotel an such..I was shipped out to various kin folk from time to time. Which is how I wound up spendin my formative years in good 'ol stink creek.
I was a wild child from the git go, always findin myself in some sorta trouble! Boy howdy and a couple a whups on the behind I did! Not too many folk could make me mind in those days..cept of course my Pappy and Mamma Hazel..Thats right Thelmas mama was an important part of my upbringin..although Thelma might not know it seein that I was from the "fun" side 'o the tracks and she was from the good side...Mamma Hazel a kept us seperate on purpose. But if they was ever a woman to mind in those days it was Mamma Hazel! Boy Howdy one look from her and you just knew you best be a watchin your step or she'd come along and whup you upside your head and make you memorize them old bible verses! OOOOEEE and a side 'o deutronomy!
I still watch my step around Mama Hazel. Iffen she ever knew what I was doin in vegas with her preacher..well Louise dodn't even want to think them thoughts! You best never tell your Mamma now Thelma ya hear?
Hoo boy..jus thinkin them thoughts has got me all shook up. I think I'll leave y'all now. I need to get me some fortitude in the form of Boones farm! Why yes I do...until next time..Hey if y'all got somethin ya wanta know about me and Thelma, you just leave youself a comment at the bottom y'hear?